Well, hmmm. This is serious. Making a list of my top 10 reasons why I exist would have to include family and fun! Pics from a recent Santa Cruz family reunion shows I participated in both a reunion and adventure. Rode a roller coaster 4 times and caught up with over 25 relatives. Something spiritual also seems like a good idea ... to cover my bases in case there is a heaven, which by the way, I do believe exists. 

So here goes my list:
1) To raise healthy, happy, well-adjusted & productive children. 
2) To seek God's peace & enjoy Her/Him forever.
3) To love, teach, embrace, help, & heal others from negativity.
4) To function successfully within a family unit.
5) To be playful in a balanced way as a self-wellness activity.
6) To take care of myself responsibly so as not be a burden to society.
7) To think in creative ways & write more immediately-useful books.
8) To gain personal knowledge, strength, peace of mind, wisdom etc.
9) To be grateful for the gift of life & for my 96-year old mother.
10) To be a positive influence on the planet & have a small carbon footprint.

Make your own list. Now think about how you really spend your time. What are your core values and do you honor them on a regular basis? If not, what's taking up your time? Do you want to re-position yourself to match your core self? Would you be happier if you did that? 

What's the best way to bring up a sensitive subject to my partner? My wife? My boyfriend? 

How do I make a request for change without hurting any feelings? 

Is there a way to make my partner more receptive to my ideas?
Complete my Focused-Language Intimacy-Exercise twice a month for 10 minutes to keep the spark alive. Flip a coin to see who goes first. Ask these three questions (or make up your own):

1) On a scale from 1-100, where do you see our intimacy level?
2) Where would you like it to be? (on same scale)
3) What can I do to help move us from a ____ to a ____?

You must follow five rules in order to be kind during the process. The trick is the rules you have to follow:

Rule #1:  Questioner may not talk. (May ask, "Can you give me an example?")
Rule #2: Questioner may not argue.
Rule #3: Questioner may not criticize.
Rule #4: Questioner may not interrupt.
Rule #5: Questioner may not give excuses.

Then switch places.  Choose your words carefully. Loving couples will process the information and apply it to their daily routine. A behavioral transfer is much more likely to happen when people don't feel attacked or criticized. This single interactive partnering practice will keep your relationship on the same positive page!

Many individuals are trying to discover what they did wrong in the last relationship. They don't want to blow it with their current partner. Learn how to maintain a healthy relationship. Everyone deserves to feel loved, valued, appreciated & supported. The truth is, you have to give in order to receive. Hold up a mirror. Be the compassionate, fun-loving light you were meant to be and your partnership will flourish.