Did you know that our behavioral matrix & personal programming determines roughly 91% of our decisions? Just think about that for a moment

Get a grip! Get a life! Get a pulse! Get a brain! 


Those exclamations correlate to the four (4) basic programs or style of behavior that I want to talk about today.
1) THE CONTROLLER
You may be primarily a controller who has high expectations of yourself & others. You want to control most everything around you. You crave control. Power is your goal. You take on responsibilities as if you're meant to be in charge.

You dislike failure or feeling vulnerable. You are task oriented. Controllers love new challenges and usually are in positions of authority. Are you a decisive person? Do you take leadership roles in your job or community?

Your weaknesses include perfectionism. You can become overly critical of self & others for not meeting your expectations. And you can be a little arrogant. After all, you have superior intelligence. Sometimes you fail at maintaining a relationship because of these flaws. (My ex-husband fell into this category in the behavior matrix.) 

Results motivate you.

2) THE SUPPORTER
Are you easy-going & like to have fun? Is pleasure a big goal? Then you most likely fit into this category. 

Do you dislike stress, negativity or boredom? Fortunately, relationships come naturally. After all, you are a people-pleaser. You want harmony on the homefront. You avoid confrontation if possible. You're flexible and go with the flow. Everyone paints you as a positive person with a sunny disposition.

On the flip side, you may tend to procrastinate. You can spend money you can't really afford. So credit cards may be your downfall. Sometimes others take advantage of your good nature and walk all over you. You are not a serious person. 

Freedom motivates you. You also love material rewards.


3) THE ANALYST
If you're detail-oriented & a neat person, you're probably an analyst. I don't think it's a coincidence that the word, anal, is in the title. You are very organized & have a very set schedule. You like to eat and work at specific times. You're learning process is precise & you study new things in the same way.

Do you dislike uncertainty & chaos? You can't stand being around obnoxious people & will find any excuse to leave an environment that doesn't meet your standards. You handle tasks & relationships in a balanced way. 

You'd make a great teacher! Any job where you can share your skills & knowledge with others makes you happy. 

You can't stand change, which makes you very anxious and stressed. Life is full of change, so sometimes you overcompensate by being too easy-going.

Learning, money, and new challenges motivate you. You analyze data quietly & make decisions based on your considerable processing.


4) THE PROMOTER
You love adventure & action of any kind. You talk fast, move fast, and act fast. You might have been a cheerleader (literally or figuratively) in the past. 

A promoter hates dishonesty and rules. Like the analyst, you also hate boredom. You'll create events & situations in order to fill your schedule. 

You love completing tasks. Still, you have solid relationships, which are important to you.
You are a doer. People come to you when they need something to be accomplished. In other words, you are very dependable. Most consider you a hard worker.

On the other hand, you have a few weaknesses. For example, you over-commit yourself & then become exhausted afterward. Promoters can be blunt and disorganized because of the extra stress they put on themselves. 

What motivates you? Simple. Your mantra is, Let's party!


Now that you know which behavioral matrix fits your personality, make the most of it. Drive home your strengths & partner with someone who complements you. 
 
 
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Most of us over-schedule our lives to the point that we don't know if we're coming or going! 

Complications take on a momentum all their own, which can fill your precious time that is not allotted to them. 

Focus on the immediate necessary activities needed to keep you and your family fulfilled.

Everything else is just noise! 

Cancel a few social activities temporarily. Do you really have to say "Yes" to everybody? Spend some time day-dreaming. Think about what areas of your life you can simplify and gain a level of comfort and contentment. If you're in the classic dilemma of wanting to go somewhere and not wanting to go, decide now to stay home for the next two weeks. Will you get more sleep? Read a book? 

Stay off of social media for a couple of days. See how much better you feel about spending your time eye-to-eye with real people like your children, spouse, or friends. 

Cut back on household chores, too. Remember, nobody is going to say, "You should've kept a cleaner house," on your tombstone.

Nobody can push your hot buttons if you're not around. Let that be your mantra for the rest of the month!

 
 
Well, hmmm. This is serious. Making a list of my top 10 reasons why I exist would have to include family and fun! Pics from a recent Santa Cruz family reunion shows I participated in both a reunion and adventure. Rode a roller coaster 4 times and caught up with over 25 relatives. Something spiritual also seems like a good idea ... to cover my bases in case there is a heaven, which by the way, I do believe exists. 

So here goes my list:
1) To raise healthy, happy, well-adjusted & productive children. 
2) To seek God's peace & enjoy Her/Him forever.
3) To love, teach, embrace, help, & heal others from negativity.
4) To function successfully within a family unit.
5) To be playful in a balanced way as a self-wellness activity.
6) To take care of myself responsibly so as not be a burden to society.
7) To think in creative ways & write more immediately-useful books.
8) To gain personal knowledge, strength, peace of mind, wisdom etc.
9) To be grateful for the gift of life & for my 96-year old mother.
10) To be a positive influence on the planet & have a small carbon footprint.

Make your own list. Now think about how you really spend your time. What are your core values and do you honor them on a regular basis? If not, what's taking up your time? Do you want to re-position yourself to match your core self? Would you be happier if you did that? 

 
 
The minute we stop moving and learning new things, is the minute we stop living fully. To put it another way, our brains start to expire. 
Read all the great research! Tell your brain to regenerate new cells. If you don't try new things or move, your cells lose their ability to repair themselves. 
http://bit.ly/GrowBrainCells 

When you don't exercise either mentally or physically, your cells believe they're getting ready to die. So they give up. Use positive self-talk and move every day. #growbraincells

Grow your brain cells. Alter your life! 
 
 
Focus. 

Be Still.Take action.

Get Inspired.


Draw Lines. 

Create Peace.


Invigorate Others. 
Of course, I think of myself as a relatively normal human being. Is that normal? We all can be a hyper-focused on our electronic devices. We also can become a bit lazy, self-absorbed, and set in our ways. I admit to these faults at times. Naturally, we typically create a rationalization for each of them. Human beings--and a few presidents--find a rationale for worse behaviors, believe me. 

Spontaneity leads to an open life; structure gives rise to intolerance. 

To be an open book or a closed private person, that is the question. No worries there. Nobody cares which way we turn so why respond to insignificant obligations or witless commitments? Take a breathe. 

Flexibility is not always an asset. Just like the fatal adaptation of the frog in science class which adjusted to the slowly boiled water so perfectly that he died. Never adapt to evil or foolishness. Don't go down the rabbit hole. And if you ask me, we all go down the slippery slope sometimes.
The trick is to learn from our mistakes. 

I do feel splintered occasionally. I accept that along with my own asininity.My mind flickers and travels in a myriad directions, like confetti floating to the ground after a grand parade. I can hardly stand the confusion. Were I to control the world, I would stop its rotation long enough to catch my breath. To stop the madness. Wanna get off the merry-go-round of life? Let's turn off all electronic devices and think for ourselves. Be still. We must avoid losing control of our thoughts. That's what Orwell's book, 1984, was all about. Whichever way our minds turns, it's important to have clarity, purpose, compassion, joy, and curiosity. Always be curious. 

Recreate yourself every moment. Which moment? Only this one and this one and this one etc. Accept that we don't know what we don't know. Unplug. Listen. Absorb.

 Nobody ever got any smarter listening to themselves talk! 
 
 
Is there some area of your life you want to tweak for the better? 

I'm very excited to highlight a quick, easy read, Take Charge of Your Life, which may be just the tool you need for a kick start a new habit.  


Verbalize & visualize! Easy,right?
My favorite fresh re-start button is two (2) things you should tell yourself in the mirror every morning to create the day you want. After that, spend a few minutes visualizing your perfect day, just like the movie What the Bleep Do We Know? says we can do. You'll surprise yourself in just two weeks. It's all quantum theory stuff that sometimes makes my brain explodes. Bam! 

So, don't be a Change-Martyr and let life happen to you. Take action and create the life you've always dreamed about. 

Please visit: 
http://wisewords4women.com/take-charge-of-your-life.html 
I'd also appreciate it if you like or share this link on Facebook and/or Twitter.  
 
 
I decided to walk barefoot on the golf course last night to ground myself and clear my head. For the first 10 minutes, many thoughts swirled around my head. I had many thoughts about a recent project I was working on for hours and I kept thinking about what I needed to get done. So much to do in so little time. It's my day off. I'm supposed to be relaxing a little bit, right? 
Suddenly, I remembered something Eckardt Tolle said on Oprah's Super Soul Sunday show. So I put my palms facing each other directly in front of me, still walking, and said to myself, I am only in this moment. Not the past nor the future. Feel the grass under my feet. See colors. Hear birds. Let go of my thoughts. Just feel. 

A remarkable thing happened. Within minutes, I slowed down my pace, my heart and my breathing and took in the nature around me. I felt an inner peace and serenity for the next 20 minutes. So great. If only I could take that inner peace everywhere I go. I believe it's possible, but I'm not there yet. I'll keep striving. 
 
 
In 1992, on Thanksgiving night, I  was reading a bedtime story to my then-four-year-old daughter, Janelle. I had to put her brother, Grant, to bed so I gave her a kiss on the forehead and said goodnight.  

As I was getting up to leave, she tugged at my shirt, trying to get me to lay back down. Then she stupefied me, MomWhat's the most important thing about being human?  
Well, that stopped me in my tracks. Those were her exact words. I'll never forget them. I paused a long while and tilted my head to one side, I think it's our ability to love...to love others, to love God, and to love ourselves. What do you think it is, sweetie? 
     
That's a good answer, Mom, but I wanna think about it some more tomorrow, Janelle said. What an old-soul response. I always told her to think for herself, but I never expected her to do it at the ripe ole age of four, three months shy of her 5th birthday. Such a profound question from a young child.


How would you answer her question?